The Plaid Pladd

I don’t know about you, but those fire safety lectures we had in elementary school scared the hell out of me when I was a kid. I was convinced that my house would burn to the ground and had a detailed plan for which of my belongings I would grab while fleeing from my collapsing inferno of a home. I had almost completely forgotten about this latent fear until yesterday when my Serenity movie night was interrupted by a strange orange glow seeping through the blinds. At first we thought it was just headlights, but headlights don’t flicker. Also usually don’t shine in to second floor windows.

FIRE!!

So there are these dumpsters about a hundred paces from my front door, and next to them is a strange fenced off little enclosure where people dump old mattresses or furniture. There are plenty of overhanging trees too.

When we first walked outside, the wind was up and we were getting hit with sparks.

Luckily Rachel is quickest on the cellphone draw and called 911. We found out someone already had. People from the Business and Professional Women’s Club next door were already gathering to take pictures with their cellphones stupidly close. Some other apartment dwellers, slightly more freaked out because, you know, we live here, started gathering and trying to move their cars. Joe immediately accused the guy holding a cigarette of starting the whole thing and returning to the scene of the crime.

Goodbye, unsightly fire hazard dangerously close to my front door

Luckily Carrboro Fire and Rescue showed up speedily

Which is good, since I haven’t had a detailed plan of what to grab while fleeing my house since I was about seven.

From our front porch

The fire was probably started by a tossed cigarette, but since almost everyone in North Carolina smokes, I doubt they’ll find out who is responsible. A policeman did come and talk to us, but of course we didn’t come outside until the fire was huge so we weren’t much help. Personally, I am suspicious of the Business and Professional Women’s Club. They always park in our parking lot and whenever I pass by, it’s just MEN hanging out outside. Where are the Professional Women? Is it just a front for something? I will continue to stare out my window with binoculars until someone is brought to justice or I am fined for being a total creeper.

This morning the air still smells like Smores.