I suspect there are more people than you’d think who dislike most or all traditional Thanksgiving food. My personal opinions are:
Turkey: Bland and uninteresting
Gravy: Incredibly suspect and not to be trusted
Cranberry Sauce: Just give up and be JELLO already
Mashed potatoes: Acceptable
Stuffing/Dressing: Good. Or, I guess I should say, the variation of it my family makes is good. The kind that comes from a box that Steven likes tastes like eating instant grits before cooking them.
Green bean casserole: Why would you want to adulterate perfectly good green beans?
Sweet potato casserole: Too sweet unless it is literally just marshmallows on top of a sweet potato. None of this brown sugar/melted butter nonsense.
And the thing is, I don’t think I’m the only one that thinks most Thanksgiving food is just kind of eh, at best. And still almost everyone eats the same thing every year, just because it’s “tradition”. Lame.
If you’ve ever heard me rant about weddings at all (and anyone who asks me anything like “Have you set a date yet?”, hears my entire speech of righteousness), you know that I hate doing things just for tradition’s sake. Somehow as a child I got the impression that once I became an adult, no one was going to tell me what to do ever again. Obviously, this is untrue, and I admit that I need to follow orders at work and school. But I’m not going to let society push me around if I don’t have to. Which is why I have always vowed that once I became master of my own Thanksgiving, things would change. The menu would be replaced with my six favorite foods, the things I was thankful for. That menu would look like this:
Spaghetti
Homemade bread
Chicken Noodle Casserole
Fried Rice
Broccoli and cheese
Chocolate mousse
And it would be the BEST Thanksgiving ever! For me. This year, I realized that this dream could become a REALITY. Even though I am not having Thanksgiving alone, I realized I could become master of my own Thanksgiving by being on the ball and forcing everyone to agree to make their one favorite food instead of the usual nonsense. And it worked! So far the menu looks like this:
Spaghetti (Me)
Chicken fingers (Steven)
Meatloaf (Thomas)
Some kind of pie (Mom Ladd)
Some kind of vegetable thing (Dad)
Don’t look now, Charlie Brown, but it’s going to be the best Thanksgiving ever, because I’m going to willingly eat every dish on the table!
What foods would you bring to Thanksgiving 2.0?