So when I came in yesterday, this letter was taped to the front desk, written in shaky pencil, but with good spelling:
Dear Librarian,
I am very sorry that I lost the book Great Citizen’s of the U.S.. It was a good book and I enjoyed reading it but now because of me no one else will get to enjoy it like I did. I don’t know where it is but I would like to buy the library another book with the money from the first book. I hope you will forgive me. I will keep my eye out for it.
Sincerely,
[Overly Contrite Child Whose Mom May or May Not Have Forced Him To Write This Letter]
—-
“I want a book about a dinosaur that doesn’t like the other dinosaurs and just wants to be an astronaut but then the other dinosaurs make fun of him and he thinks it’s impossible but then he finds out it’s not impossible because Santa tells him he can do it so he goes into space and meets aliens and Dora the Explorer.”
My attempts to encourage this kid to write this book instead of expecting me to find it for him alas were met with much chagrin. The look on his face clearly said, “What kind of a library is this, anyway?”
—
Nature
Sportysm
Socistyle.
My heart
for
you.
The Korean girl I tutor wears a shirt that says this all the time. Sometimes I think she wears it just for me because it has “English” on it, although clearly the kind of English you find on shirts in Korea. Other times I think it might be some kind of secret incantation. Nature… Sportysm…. Socistyle… My heart for you. Of course, I suspect mysticism anytime I’s appear to be replaced with Y’s.