Anyway, I have decided to change my mind:

Polka bands are clearly AWESOME. I want to form my own to cover Lady Gaga songs. I call accordion!

Also, I’ve been getting so much Russian spam on my blog that when I signed on Google was all: “We’ve noticed this page is in Russian, do you want us to translate it for you?” and I was all “STOP OVERRIDING MY DEFAULTS BY SHEER NUMBERS, SPAMBOTS.” Don’t worry, I won’t give up the good fight.

This return involved two plane rides and a sandwich in Baltimore, whose airport is actually just a mall where some planes hang out. On the latter plane, Steven and I decided that the BEST POSSIBLE use of our time was to write each other notes while listening to our respective iPods. Naturally this quickly devolved into joint poetry:

I wrote Steven’s in italics because he has the prettier handwriting. I would try to recreate mine, but there’s no html for “six year old holding a pen in her fist”.

Where are my keys, I lost my phone
Alone, along it falls…
I window shop with you in my mind
A flannel shirt at the five and dime
I can’t get no satisfaction
Underthings. Tumbling.
I thought I was smarter as I flew into the sun
Lord Belford’s shot came rumbling, our rebel forces reeled
Have you seen your mother, baby, standing in the shadows?
Have you ever loved someone so much you thought your little heart would break in two?
I didn’t think so.
Give me a word, give me a sign. Show me how to look, tell me what will I find…
Godzilla got pissed and began to attack but he didn’t expect to be rocked by Shaq
Collecting each thing, reflecting his world
Breaking my back just to know your name
I know that I can find the fire in your eyes
Where hydrogen is built into helium at a temperature of millions of degrees
And made of glass, dreams from the past wait for this day
It all would have been different if he’d seen her in daylight
When you’re out there on your own, where your memories can find you
I’m interested in things. I’m not a real doctor
I got to drowning in the blues
It’s astounding; time is fleeting
Hooray for new math!
It’s 12pm so he starts with a thriller
And every kid on the whole damn street was gonna make it big on every beat
Into my brain goes a bang bang bang till my feet do the same
And I don’t wanna say I told you so, but I told you so
A girl in every port and gadgets up my sleeve
The world is not enough for the both of us it seems
It’s a brand new day and the sun is high
Cause your friends don’t dance and if they don’t dance then their no friends of mine
Oh I drank some champagne from your shoe, la la la
I’d let you watch, I would invite you, but the queens we use would not excite you
In these days of cool reflection, you come to me and every thing seems alright
When they cut me open I guess I changed my mind
Learning to match the beat of the old world man
Have you ever heard the wolf cry to the blue corn moon?
I still hear the snares in the square, colors ablaze in the evening
Isn’t it enough to know I ruined a pony making a gift for you?
You don’t fool me, those restless eyes, that sexy smile
It’s times like these I wonder what would Jimmy Buffet do?
Show me how to lie, you’re getting better all the time
The few who grew up tall and proud in the shadow of the mushroom cloud
No dark sarcasm in the classroom
Let’s keep the freaking out to a minimum.

Then we played the game of guessing what song each line was from. Exciting times!

Almost as exciting as seeing my play tonight!! Anna tells me that it’s getting Tony buzz already. But even if things don’t turn out, at least I will have my massive amounts of pie to console me. Which reminds me that I need to put a fork in my purse.