Posts Tagged ‘arrested development’

ABC DVD: Arrested Development 3.2

Making a Stand
Michael lets GOB open up a new branch of the banana stand, so he chooses a site directly across from the original, hires his son, Steve Holt, and begins competing. Later they discover it was their dad trying to pit them against each other, so they hire some painters/actors to “teach him a lesson”. It doesn’t work.


In a very meta episode, the Bluths host a charity dinner to save themselves. Meaningless guest appearances. Andy Richter’s identical quintuplet brothers! Lindsay’s poisonous attempts at cooking.


Fakin It
The family participates in a pilot of the show Mock Trial with J. Reinhold to practice getting ready for court. Buster pretends to be in a coma so he won’t have to testify. Michael wonders who “N. Bluth” on some documents and accounts is. The prosecutor threatens Michael and he gets it on tape.


Family Ties
George Sr. wrecks all the Bluth company computers, so they bring out super old ones. Michael finds the name and phone number of a “Nellie” on one whom he thinks might be his long-lost sister. Turns out, she’s actually George Sr.’s prostitute and GOB is her pimp. Michael hires her as a “business consultant” and even though they aren’t actually related she helps the company.


Exit Strategy
George Michael invites all of Maeby’s “friends” from her address book to her 16th birthday party, outing her as a teen and losing her job at the studio. GOB ends up in an Iraqi prison on a USO tour and Michael and Buster head to Iraq to save him. While there, they visit one of the Bluth model homes and discover a bunch of Saddam look-alikes watching his trial on tv. They also find a fake wmd that was planted there by the US government, making George Sr. actually a patsy like he has always claimed.


Development Arrested
Michael finds out his mother has been the real cause of all the dirty business. Lindsay finds out she was adopted. Maeby’s old studio wants to make a tv show or a movie about her experiences. George Michael discovers that his ex-girlfriend Ann has been dating GOB. Stan Sitwell buys the Bluth company, Lucille tries to steal the Queen Mary to escape from the SEC (alerted by a long-lost Annyong), and Michael and George Michael escape to Cabo in GOB’s yacht but find George Sr. already there. The end.


Trish’s Review
I’m just glad Annyong came back in the end.
Rating: Four out of five fake wmds
Kill/Fuck/Marry: Marry one of the Saddam look-alikes. Fuck Nellie because everyone is doing it. Kill everyone.

Steven’s Review
So many good things. Mock Trial. Thanks for letting us know William Hung still has a career of some sort. It also brought us the joys of “My Name is Judge.” And poor Maeby, I felt so bad for her the whole time.
Rating: five out of five hot cops
Kill/Fuck/Marry: Fuck Nellie. Marry Annyoung because that’s some loyalty right there. So many choices for Kill… anybody with the name of Bluth.

Previously: Arrested Development: 3.1
Next: Back to the Future I

ABC DVD: Arrested Development 3.1

The Cabin Show
Michael discovers that George Sr’s twin brother Oscar is in jail in his place. The family sells the land the family cabin is on and are forced to haul the cabin away on the back of a truck. GOB finds out he has a son, and it’s Steve Holt.


For British Eyes Only
George Sr. insists that he was set up by a British syndicate, and Michael heads to Wee Britain to check it out. While there, he meets a girl named Rita whom he is instantly and awkwardly attracted to, and he is threatened by an English dude, which makes him believe his father was telling the truth.


Lindsay tries and fails to flirt with the family’s new attorney, Bob Loblaw. Rita is working with Trevor, the dude who threatened Michael in the last episode. The Bluths think Michael is shredding the evidence against them so he can take the fall, rather than trying to destroy evidence of his family so he won’t have to introduce them to Rita. They decide to throw a surprise party for him and pick Rita up in their cabin-on-wheels. They end up knocking her out and roofieing her because Bluths.


GOB is still avoiding Steve Holt, so Michael agrees to do the father-son triathalon with him at the Church and State Fair. They train too hard and Michael can’t take it. George Michael contemplates signing up for the army, and George Sr. delivers a “scared straight” lecture to gay men instead of the at-risk youth. He flees in a fake pope mobile. Anne and Maeby both enter an “inner beauty” contest which GOB judges.


Mr. F
Michael realizes that the building site is riddled with mole hills and is worried what the Japanese investors will think. GOB suggests building a tiny town and telling them its just really far away. Michael rejects this plan, but GOB does it anyway. George Sr. ships a jet pack to the model home, thinking it can further his escape attempt, but it is intercepted by George Michael, who thinks it’s a birthday gift from his father. Bob Loblaw reveals that the family may have a mole ratting them out to the feds named “Mr. F” the family suspects Rita and calls immigration, but really it’s Tobias and his gym buddy, who asks him to “play a mole”. Tobias thinks he’s auditioning for a part. This happens:


The Ocean Walker
Michael decides to marry Rita so she can get a green card. The Bluths are against it until Trevor shows up, reveals that he’s Rita’s uncle and that she’s loaded. Also, mentally around age 6. The Bluths decide to not let Michael find out until after the wedding so they can get their hands on that sweet dough. George Michael shows Michael a video of Rita eating fake fruit and the jig is up.


Prison Break In
The Bluth Foundation Dinner is coming up, and Lindsay pressures the family into raising money for “GVH” or “Graft Versus Host”: basically Tobias’ hair implants are killing him but he refuses to give them up. The dinner is being held at the prison, catered by inmates, because Lucille and Warden Gentiles are tight. The dinner crowd finds out about the patheticness of the “disease” and riots.


Trish’s Review
I love Rita. I can’t help it. Also, Bob Loblaw is pretty great. Season 3 really marks this show’s desperate descent into outright madness as the reality of its impending cancellation becomes clear.
Rating: Five out of five deadly Mary Poppins puppets
Kill/Fuck/Marry: Kill Michael because he somehow annoys me the most in these episodes. Fuck Trevor because he’s into some kinky shit. Marry Rita because the Bluths are right: money is awesome and I love her fashion sense.

You know, kinky shit

You know, kinky shit

Steven’s Review
The Rita story arc is the best part of arrested development.
Rating: 5 out of 5 bumpaddles
Kill/Fuck/Marry: Obviously marry Rita for that sweet, sweet dough. Ordinarily I would still go with Kill Tobias except he made a great mole, so I’m going to have to agree with you and kill Michael because he’s a freaking moron. As for Fuck, it’s a toss up between Rita’s uncle and Warden Gentiles. Because clearly that dude can make shit happen.

Previously: Arrested Development Season 2.3
Next: Arrested Development Season 3.2

ABC DVD: Arrested Development 2.3

Motherboy XXX
Lucille is ashamed of Buster’s hook hand so she concocts a plan to take George Michael to the annual “Motherboy” competition/dance event instead. Michael is determined to rescue him, and Buster agrees to help. Other boys wish they were being rescued from Motherboy.


The Immaculate Election
Ann and Michael convince George Michael to run for school president, but when Michael finds out his son has no chance against Steve Holt, he asks Gob to use George Sr.’s dirty tricks to get him elected. Gob makes an incendiary campaign video that backfires, but impresses Ann with his light saber moves. Lindsay kicks Tobias out, so he dresses up as a British nanny named Mrs. Featherbottom to come back. They know it’s him, but the house has never been so clean.


Sword of Destiny
Gob buys a “sword of destiny” and pretends to be Buster’s magical assistant since he can’t get a gig himself after the Magician’s Alliance kicked him out. Michael is hospitalized with appendicitis and thinks no one can do anything without him, but then everything is fine. Well, as fine as anything ever is.


Meat the Veals
George Michael wants to ask Ann to get pre-engaged and Michael decides the Veals need to meet his family so they will disapprove of the idea. Unfortunately, Lucille is depressed about George Sr. being gone and Gob is busy helping George Sr. kidnap Lucille for a secret vow renewal ceremony so they aren’t as awful as usual. Mrs. Veal takes Michael’s compliments (comparative to Ann) as come-ons tries to make out with him. Everyone ends up fighting at the church and George Sr. runs away again.


Spring Breakout
Michael checks Lucille into rehab until Kitty returns and demands to see her. She challenges Lucille to a drinking contest for George Sr.’s sperm. Lucille wins. GOB blows up the family yacht as part of a magic trick.


Righteous Brothers
The model home collapses because it is shoddily made. George Michael and Maeby kiss. Tobias and Kitty leave together for Las Vegas, and Michael and GOB get in a fight on the courthouse lawn. They are separated by George Sr. who says there’s been too much fighting in the family and he’s going to turn himself in. Instead, he shaves and frames his twin brother Oscar.


Trish’s Review
This is a strong set of episodes with some of the most memorable minor characters like Mr. and Mrs. Veal and Tony Wonder. The best part is probably when all the different storylines get ratcheted up to 11 in Righteous Brothers.
Rating: five out of five coolers full of sperm
Kill/Fuck/Marry: Kill Lucille because Motherboy is a terrible thing to inflict on anyone. Fuck Mrs. Veal and then get in an epic duel with Mr. Veal. Marry Tony Wonder, the magician, because he ~magically~ gives out free food and I like sandwiches.


Steven’s Review
Okay, yeah. This is where we get the good stuff. Badass Lucille makes an appearance, “Mrs. Featherbottom” makes “her” debut, and each episode seems to be daring the next one to be even more ridiculous. And seriously, the acting talent that we’re getting in this set is fantastic; Alan Tudyk and Ben Stiller in addition to the usual crew. Not to mention we finally see George Michael and Maeby finally seal the deal! (Or at least make out, but for them that’s close enough). Best line for me had to be Mrs. Veal begging Michael to teach her the ways of the secular flesh. And don’t forget the great Christian talk show, “And As It Is Such, Also As Such Is It Unto”
Rating Five out of five severed fingers
Kill/Fuck/Marry Kill Gob, because it’s a mercy to him and everyone else around him. Fuck Mrs. Veal (duh). Marry Kitty, because wouldn’t that be a wild ride?

Previously:Arrested Development 2.2
Next: Arrested Development 3.1

ABC DVD: Arrested Development 2.2

Switch Hitter
Gob goes to work with the Bluth Company’s competitor, although they may or may not be after him to win against the Bluth company in an upcoming softball game.


Queen for a Day
Some Bluth stock is finally unfrozen, but it’s important not to sell so that they retain control of the company. Unfortunately, no one listens, including Michael, who buys a corvette. Tobias buys a gay night club called The Queen Mary and converts a gang into being dancers (really they were the Hot Cops posing as a gang). He ends up getting stabbed after trying this on a real gang. The Bluths do lose control of the company to Lucille 2, who says she bought the stock because she wants to support them, but then decides to maintain control to get back at Lucille 1.


Burning Love
Michael awkwardly tries to get with his childhood crush, Sally Sitwell, daughter of Stan Sitwell, the Bluth company’s main competitor. After finally hearing that her father approves of the match, Michael swaps his corvette with him for the money to buy Sally at the annual bachelorette auction, but she isn’t pysched about having her dad’s approval and turns him down. George Sr. installs a hot tub in the model home’s attic and instantly regrets it.


Ready, Aim, Marry Me!
Michael is convinced that majority-holder Lucille 2 and Stan Sitwell are colluding against the company (really they are just in love). He calls in his dad’s friend “Uncle Jack” (not really their uncle) to try to bail them out, but his condition is a romantic date with Lindsay. Michael goes on a romantic date with Tobias to keep him from finding out, and Gob and Buster use army training and magic to spy on Lucille 2 because they are both secretly in love with her.


Out on a Limb
Michael learns that Maggie Lizer, whom he slept with 9 months ago, is 9 months pregnant. He gets Tobias and Lindsay to break into her house, steal her urine, and test it. It comes back positive, so he assumes that 1) she’s telling the truth (she isn’t), and 2) he’s really the father (he’s not, and she tells him he’s not). Buster swims in the ocean before being shipped off to Iraq, and gets his hand bitten off by a seal wearing a bow tie.


Hand to God
Buster deals with losing his hand. Michael discovers that Maggie is NOT pregnant with his baby, but is acting as a surrogate for a gay police couple. They think she might be trying to keep their kid. Surprise! She’s not really pregnant at all. She outsourced it to a local waitress, who is using the pregnancy to pretend to be fat to sue the restaurant where she works. Gay policemen get their baby in the end.


Trish’s Review
This bunch is kind of a mix for me: I like the two episodes about Maggie a lot, but I absolutely hate Ready, Aim, Marry Me! because Uncle Jack is gross.
Rating: Three out of five jars of chocolate body paint
Kill/Fuck/Marry: Kill Uncle Jack because he’s disgusting. Fuck Sally Sitwell because I like her hair. Marry either or both of the gay policemen because they seem really sweet and have maybe the healthiest relationship on this entire show.


Steven’s Review
Honestly, this run had a lot of iffy episodes for me. I love the Maggie focus, and the Buster hand-loss sequences are fun, but Michael and Tobias in particular kept irritating me and throwing me out of the enjoyment-bubble. Uncle Jack gets a pass out of me because 1) I’m pretty sure it’s a silly sendup of Jack Lalanne, and 2) it’s Martin Short! (How can you not love Martin Short?)
Rating: Three out of five loose seals.
Kill/Fuck/Marry: Kill Michael, like a dozen times. It was a close contest between him and Tobias, as both of them are royal idiots for most of this disc, but I can’t help but expect ridiculous antics out of Tobias. Michael, on the other hand, needs to grow a pair like pronto. Fuck Maggie, because she’s clearly got it going on (hard to choose between her and Sally, admittedly). Marry Stan Sitwell, because this may be the most genuine (and also successful) male figure in the entire series.

Previously:Arrested Development 2.1
Next: Arrested Development 2.3

ABC DVD: Arrested Development 2.1

The One Where Michael Leaves
Michael and George Michael try to leave for Phoenix because Michael is sick of his family but the police want to hold Michael responsible for George Sr.’s crimes now that he has run away. Tobias and Lindsay decide to try an open relationship. Gob becomes president of the Bluth company and finds some incriminating evidence hidden in a wall. Lucille signs Buster up for the army after being ambushed by a Michael Moore look-alike.


The One Where They Build a House
Gob promises to build a model home in only two weeks. Buster volunteers for the crew hoping to get injured to get out of army. Lindsay attempts to date a homeless man who is really a movie star researching a role. Buster ends up seeing his mom making out with Oscar and determines to go to war. The house is empty inside and collapses.


Gene Parmesan, the Bluth’s private detective, tracks the stolen stair car down to Mexico. Michael, Lindsay, Maeby, and George Michael head down to see if they can find George Sr. George Michael also brings his girlfriend, Ann, in the hopes that Michael will get to know her and maybe remember her name. Gob thinks Michael is attempting to flee the country and hires a bounty hunter named Ice to track him. Lindsay flirts with Ice badly. Ann gets stranded in Mexico.


Good Grief
Ice determines that George Sr. was killed by the Mexican police after first being mistaken for his brother Oscar and then being recognized as the inventor of the cornballer (all of the guards have horrific burns from it). The family plans a funeral, but tells Buster it’s a birthday party so he doesn’t lose it. George Michael discovers a very much alive George Sr., who bribed the Mexican police and has returned to try to win Lucille back from Oscar, and hides him in the attic. Michael discovers the deception and fakes his father’s attic escape so that he is the only one who now knows where his father truly is.


Sad Sack
The prosecution against Michael claim they have found a landscape photo of Iraq complete with bunkers on the Bluth company server, but it turns out to be a close-up of Tobias’ balls (Barry Zuckercorn knows the truth). Michael gets George Michael glasses thinking poor vision might explain his attraction to Ann. Buster needs Gob to motivate him over a wall in boot camp.


Afternoon Delight
At the Bluth company Christmas party, Gob is mad that everyone makes fun of him and fires the entire staff. Michael convinces them to come back for another party the next day in which 1) his high mother drives her car into the banana stand, 2) Buster has to rescue Gob from the banana stand with his claw game skills, 3) both Michael and Maeby AND Lindsay and George Michael have embarrassing karoke renditions of Afternoon Delight.


Trish’s Review
I feel like these are some of the strongest episodes in one stretch so far! I love Ann, Tobias’ attempts to join the Blue Man Group, and Buster in the army.
Rating: Five out of five fake-corpse pinatas
Kill/Fuck/Marry: Kill Tobias, because when in doubt I always kill Tobias. Fuck Ice, the bounty hunter. Marry Gene Parmesan because we both have a penchant for dressing up.

Steven’s Review
I actually really enjoyed most of this set, but it has the nagging tendency to feature more of Michael screwing up by giving his family opportunities to do it to him. Fix your indecision, man! They should be totally dead to you by now!
Rating: Four out of five cornballer burns
Kill/Fuck/Marry: Kill Michael, because he’s dead to me at this point. Fuck Barry, because everyone else seems to be into it, although he’s probably got every last STD by now. Marry Maeby, because she’s 1) constantly asking you to, and 2) making it big in the movies! Financial security assured!

Previously: Arrested Development 1.3
Next: Arrested Development 2.2

ABC DVD: Arrested Development 1.3

Episode 15: Staff Infection
Michael discovers everyone in the family has been on the company payroll and so puts them all to work. Buster and GOB get into a fight at the construction site, which the other workers insist they settle with a construction-equipment duel. The feds do a subpar job of installing new lighting in the Bluth offices while scoping out the place.


Episode 16: Missing Kitty
Michael fires Kitty, the secretary, for being awful, but George Sr. insists she knows too much. She flashes him a lot. GOB tries to get on a Girls With Low Self-Esteem video by “magically disappearing” i.e. blowing up his family’s yacht. That Kitty happened to be inside?!


Episode 17: Altar Egos
GOB convinces Michael to have a one-night stand (no real names!) and ends up sleeping with a blind woman while pretending to be a pirate lawyer. Surprise! She turns out to be the prosecutor on George Sr.’s case. GOB’s night also didn’t go as planned when he accidentally got married to Amy Poehler (RIP Will Arnett and Amy Poehler’s love).


Episode 18: Justice is Blind
Michael feels guilty about trying to one-night stand a blind girl, so he continues to pretend to pursue a relationship with her. He feels even more guilty about being Michael Bluth and eventually confesses. He takes her dog Justice to the vet and discovers that JUSTICE IS BLIND meaning that Maggie could see that whole time. Maeby is scamming her school out of my money by pretending to be her own sickly twin sister, Surely.


Episode 19: Best Man for the GOB
GOB is still married to Amy Poehler so Michael offers to throw him a bachelor party. George Sr. decides to throw one instead, using it as an opportunity to frame his accountant for murder to prevent him from testifying. Buster gets hopped up on juice.


Episode 20: Whistler’s Mother
George Sr.’s twin brother Oscar shows up to ask for money and pursue an affair with Lucille. He convinces Michael to buy his useless lemon grove and lets George Sr. take the fall when it turns out to be a bad deal. Eventually Lucille saves the day with her geriatric sexual allure.

Episode 21: Not Without My Daughter
Michael takes Maeby to Take Your Daughter to Work Day and makes a deal with her that the first of them to lie will pay the other $50. Then the police show up to question him about Kitty’s disappearance, since he was apparently the last one to see her ALIVE. Maeby snoops around the police station and finds Kitty very much alive and helping the police attempt to coerce Michael. Lindsey lies rather than confess she has a job at the mall, and ends up getting fired when GOB and George Michael release a bunch of mice.


Episode 22: Let Them Eat Cake
Kitty attempts to seize control of the Bluth company with the info she knows. She thinks it’s only unpaid taxes, but George Sr. confesses the Bluth company had been building houses in Iraq despite sanctions against doing business with Saddam. George Sr. fakes a heart attack during a polygraph test and subsequently escapes from the hospital.

Trish’s Review
Once again this disc was a mix of episodes I really like (“Not Without My Daughter”, anything with Maggie) and ones I would skip over if I could (“Best Man for the GOB”). This disc also saw the introduction of the Overly Literal Doctor who announces George Sr.’s escape to the family by saying, “He’s gone” and “We lost him”.


Rating: Four out of five blind seeing-eye dogs
Kill/Fuck/Marry: Kill Kitty (by blowing up a yacht she was on), Fuck Maggie (while using a false name), Marry Amy Poehler (on a dare)

Steven’s Review
I absolutely love Overly Literal Doctor, who is one of the best running gags in the show, so this is an awesome time to be alive/watching the series. Maeby also starts getting more screen time and character development, which I’m anxious for as we get closer and closer to bigshot studio producer Maeby (one of my other favorite features of the show). Also tons of great Barry time, woo! He reminds me more and more of Jim Rash’s Dean Pelton from Community.

Poison oak, Laker's tickets. He's a busy man on the dating scene.

Poison oak, Laker’s tickets. He’s a busy man on the dating scene.

Rating: Four out of five Girls With Low Self-Esteemâ„¢.
Kill/Fuck/Marry: Kill George Michael, because it’s becoming clearer and clearer here that he’s some kind of shell of a human made of equal parts Tobias and his father (Tobias once more in second place here, fighting hard to win). Fuck Kitty, because we all know what happens to those who don’t by now… Marry Maggie. For Justice!

Next: Arrested Development 2.1
Previously: Arrested Development 1.2

ABC DVD: Arrested Development 1.2

Time for Arrested Development Season 1, Disc 2!

Episode 7: My Mother, The Car
Michael keeps planning surprise birthday parties for his mom, and the rest of the family keeps not showing up. Lucille gets in a car accident and frames Michael.


Episode 8: In God We Trust
George Sr. is released for the afternoon to take part in a living art pageant where he plays God. Lucille goes on a date with the family’s prospective new lawyer. Tobias is a never-nude, and George Michael tries to impress Maeby with a muscle suit.

no god

Episode 9: Storming the Castle
Michael schemes to get Marta and GOB’s ex on stage at his magic act together so Marta will see how GOB is awful. George Michael has smooth, feminine legs.

Episode 10: Pier Pressure
Buster asks George Michael to buy some pot from GOB for him for Lucille 2 and her vertigo. GOB tells Michael, and they decide to “teach him a lesson” using GOB’s hot cop friends. George Sr. ends up teaching them a lesson about teaching lessons.


Episode 11: Public Relations
Michael hires a publicist to help make the family look better. Tobias takes an acting class from Carl Weathers.

Episode 12: Marta Complex
Marta begins to fall in love with Michael, and GOB and Michael think she is sleeping with someone else on the cast of her show. Buster falls in love with Marta too.


Episode 13: Beef Consomme
Michael and Marta want to be together, but feel guilty. GOB continues to hunt for the man Marta’s been sleeping with. Buster hires a mariachi band. Marta finds the three brothers fighting over her and says goodbye to all of them.

Episode 14: Shock and Aww
George Michael has a crush on his ethics teacher. So does Michael. She has a crush on Saddam Hussein. Lucille adopts a Korean boy out of spite. They think his name is Annyong but that really just means Hello in Korean.


Trish’s Review
A few of these episodes are less strong (“Pier Pressure” and “Marta Complex” def), but “Public Relations” and “Shock and Aww” are two of my faves. They both have running jokes that quietly play throughout the whole episode, and “Shock and Aww” introduces Annyong who is pretty great.
Rating: Four out of five pictures of Saddam Hussein in a swimsuit cut out of a rare library book.
Kill/Fuck/Marry: Kill Michael because he starts to annoy me in these episodes, especially with his convoluted plans to get with Marta. Fuck Beth Baerly, the ethics teacher, because she’s played by Heather Graham and seems up for whatever. Marry the hot cops. All of them at once. ALWAYS A PARTY.


Steven’s Review
Honestly I think this is the part of the series where I really start to love Lucille (1, obviously, not 2-aka-Austero). She seems more and more genteely sociopathic, but in such a fun way that it’s hard not to love her for it. Michael and Lindsay swim in and out of likability, with Tobias sinking deeper and deeper in psychopathy-inducing awkwardness “as an actor” (which is honestly a huge credit to David Cross’s abilities as an actor in real life).
Rating: Four out of five tweaked undercover informant nipples.
Kill/Fuck/Marry: My kill vote is evenly divided between GOB and Buster, but leaning toward GOB. Fuck is obviously Beth Baerly i.e. Heather Graham, because who doesn’t want to hook up with Felicity Shagwell? Honorable mention goes to Jessie the publicist here, because girl knows what she wants and isn’t afraid of going for it! Marry… I’m still going to have to go with Marta on this one. She’s somehow managing to continue a healthy adult relationship from her end, even if she has terrible taste in men.

Previously: Arrested Development 1.1
Next: Arrested Development 1.3

ABC DVD: Arrested Development 1.1

[Insert Cool Banner Image for this project here]

After much debate, Steven and I decided that TV show seasons we own should be reported on by DVD instead of by season. Because the whole point of the project is to watch all our DVDs. Also it’ll better keep us on track, especially in the interminable year it’ll probably takes us to get through all Steven’s Stargates. So this report covers the first disc of Arrested Development season one, which is the first six episodes.

Episode 1: Pilot
George Bluth Sr. is arrested by the SEC at his retirement party after naming his wife Lucile his successor instead of his son Michael. Michael is pissed and tells his son George Michael that THEY’RE LEAVING SO THERE. He’s eventually convinced to stay through guilt from his son, his father, and the rest of his family.


Episode 2: Top Banana
Michael forces George Michael to hire his cousin Maeby at the family’s banana stand, not knowing that George Michael is trying to work extra hours there specifically to avoid her and his awkward crush. George Senior is still trying to run things from jail, including hiring an ex-con arsonist to destroy evidence, giving George Michael the idea to burn down the banana stand to escape his problems. Gob tries to dramatically hurl things into the ocean.


Episode 3: Bringing Up Buster
George Michael auditions for a role in the school play in the hopes of getting to kiss his cousin Maeby, who’s auditioning in the hopes of getting to kiss Steve Holt.
Buster crashes his bike. Everyone who goes near the corn baller regrets it.

Episode 4: Key Decisions
Gob tries to break out of prison as a publicity stunt, only kind of succeeding when he’s rushed out in an ambulance after getting stabbed by White Power Bill. Michael escorts Gob’s girlfriend Marta to an award show and starts to fall in love with her. Buster accidentally flirts with his mom’s friend (also named Lucille) while mostly-blind without his glasses.

Episode 5: Visiting Ours
Michael asks Gob to help get some info from George Senior’s secretary, Kitty, because Kitty has a crush on him. Gob is beaten up by the prison warden and accidentally witnesses his parents in the conjugal trailer. Taking the stair car to prison turns out to be a bad idea.


Episode 6: Charity Drive
Lucille and Lindsey both prepare for the bachelorette auction despite being married. To prove to each other that they are capable of good deeds, Lindsey gets lost in the wetlands and Michael kidnaps a woman. Buster accidentally bids on Lucille 2 instead of his mother, and George Senior finally confesses to Michael.


Trish’s Review

I love Arrested Development too much, and it’s so great so early on. Some shows take a season or more to really hit their stride, but these episodes are awesome and already filled with the memorable parts people love to quote.

Rating: 5 out of 5 frozen bananas
Kill/Fuck/Marry: Kill Tobias because he’s the most painfully awkward and it makes me embarrassed for him to the point where I’m physically uncomfortable. Fuck Lindsey because she’s obvs the hottest. Marry Marta, Gob’s girlfriend and Spanish-language TV star. Because she seems nice, unlike literally anyone else on the cast.

Steven’s Review

Arrested Development is one of those shows that took me awhile to get into. It’s not that the humor isn’t great (it’s hilariously on point at all times) or that the acting is poor (it’s superb on all counts). It’s just the physical gut-wrenching awkwardness of some of the characters, which their actors portray to perfection. Still, it’s kind of like the proverbial trainwreck; you just can’t look away. After all, it’s the show that gave us the most punchable face of our generation: Michael Cera.

Rating: 5 out of 5 prison shankings

Kill/Fuck/Marry: Kill Tobias because it’s honestly for his own good at this point, as well as everyone else’s. Fuck Lindsey, but you have to convince her that by doing so she’ll be spiting either her mother, her brother, or her husband. That ensures best performance, apparently. Oh, and marry Lucille 2, who is clearly single, wealthy, caring, and apparently not mentally unstable (unlike most of the rest of the cast).

Previously: 10 Things I Hate About You
Next: Arrested Development 1.2

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