Times I Have Almost Died:Cats and Seals

Of the many perils of California, none is more fearsome (to the supposedly highly allergic Patricia) than the house cat. Observe my brush with death at the hands of this cuddly assassin:

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Only pretending to be cute to deliver the killing nuzzle, cheeky devil

If not for my premeditated application of copious amounts of Claritin, I could very well be NO MORE. Or at least in sorry shape before facing the next instance of NEAR DEATH:

Again, the cuteness is a front to hide its INNER RAGE

Again, the cuteness is a front to hide its INNER RAGE

Elephant seals, like house cats, use their cuteness as a cover before attacking viciously. Luckily I was able to throw some other, less animal-savvy tourists into their path. Here they are blindly cultivating the ravenous, human-devouring instincts of another seemingly harmless creature:

Today they eat peanuts, tomorrow THE FLESH FROM OUR BONES

Today they eat peanuts, tomorrow THE FLESH FROM OUR BONES

Another time I almost died, but managed to prevail through my keen abilities of Staying Behind a Fence and Getting Back Into the Car.

Naturally their failure was a source of much disappointment to the seals

Naturally their failure was a source of much disappointment to the seals

One response to “Times I Have Almost Died:Cats and Seals”

  1. Rob says:

    AWW, that seal is soooo cute!! Also, Im glad you’re not dead!

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